Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
Are these your boobs on my camera?
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
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