I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
Randomize
