I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
Randomize
