I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
Randomize
