It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
Randomize
