Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
Randomize
