Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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