So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
Randomize
