You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
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