And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
You just missed an honest to god bukkake