Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
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