it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
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