Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
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