just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
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