oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
Randomize
