im gay
i know
yea but for you.
get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
I think im going to throw up on grandma
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
