I'm drive I can fine osifer
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
Randomize
