I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize