I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
Randomize
