Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
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Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
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