at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
Randomize