Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
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