I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
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