I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
