Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
So I was putting on a condom and looked to my right to not make eye contact, she said did you just look at the American flag while putting that on. I said this one's for Team USA.
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
Randomize
