ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
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