Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
I sent out a mass text that said "margaritas for Jesus?" and nobody responded, worst Easter ever.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
Randomize