you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
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