she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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