margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
Randomize