So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
Randomize
