YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
he thought i was a dude.
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
Blow job season was short but glorious.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize
