Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
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