She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
just balanced a champagne glass on my gut. thanks to beer im a living breathing tempur-pedic mattress.
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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