i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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