If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Randomize
