College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
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