I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
Randomize
