This girl is more easily done than said...
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
organizing the empties. That sober.
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
Randomize
