I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
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