i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
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