ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
Randomize
