he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
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Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
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