Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
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