This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
Randomize
