There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize