He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize
