I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
Words i added to my t9 today: gnomes, facebook, and chlamydia.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
Randomize