He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
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its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
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