Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
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