We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
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