I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
Randomize
